An Ode To Professor Missy Elliott, Ph.D., Sexuality and Then Some
Missy, you taught us......
........ that it's okay to get our freak on,
not to settle for a one minute man,
It's okay for a woman to talk about and want sex.....
that it's okay for a woman to lose control, especially when it's warranted (WHICH IS ALL THE TIME)
and most importantly, no matter your size, skin color, or who you are.
you must embrace your true authentic self
"Ain't no shame ladies do yo thang" -Work It, 2002
Was there anyone you admired in middle or high school? If you ask my friends and me, we'd say........Maya Angelou, Queen Latifah, Marie Curie, Erykah, and probably Remy Ma and Lil Kim. Yes, to us, those women embodied strength, power, and embraced their authentic selves. But, the one who taught us OWN our sexuality, to do us, and look good doing it would be, Queen Missy Elliott.
Sexuality or embracing one's sexuality is something we rarely talk about but when we do, women like, Madonna, Lil Kim, Deepika Padukone (I find any excuse to add her to a list) or Beyonce come to mind. For me at least, Missy Elliott has a Ph.D. in OWNING who you are and embracing what you are. From her music, style, and more importantly, the way she carried herself screamed, I know who I am, and I'm worth it. As a West African child of immigrants embracing my sexuality and embracing who I want to be as woman (especially in the States) has never been something that came easy for me. But having Missy, I mean, Professor Missy Elliott as my Professor in life and sexuality helped me build the confidence I needed to literally do me.
*prepares lessons and evidence to back up claim*
Lesson 1: Never Settle For Less
Don’t settle for "good enough" you know who you are, what you want, and if you want a hot boy or girl don't let anybody tell you different.
Lesson 2. Ladies, We Run This
Embrace everything about yourself, and “It doesn’t matter where you're from it’s where you're at” meaning if you like how you look, how you feel, that is all that matters.
Lesson 3. “Get your freak on”
No explanation, it has a hot hook, the lyrics are self-explanatory, and the video is one of the best Missy Masterpieces ever!
Lesson 4. Follow your own standard of beauty “ I got a cute face, chubby waist”
Missy redefined her standard of beauty and continues to break the standard of what a woman should look like, act like, be, and want.
And we'll end with the most important lesson of all,
Lesson 5. You're In Control, Own It " It's my window and I can't stand the rain...." "BEEP BEEP who got the keys to da Jeep?"
These two classic song lyrics to me, Missy is saying, you're in control.
The last lesson/song sums up this whole class, it embodies everything Missy is, a woman who is in control and knows what she wants. She won't let anyone put her down or define who she is.
Don't let anyone put you down or define who you are, you own who you are- FLAUNT IT!
This piece is part of our September series, A Collective Effort, lessons TV, Film, and Literature teach us about sex, and how each one plays a part on how we view sex (sex-related taboos) and sometimes reflect society's view of sex.