I always miss people more than I should… perhaps that’s why I hold on to you so tight, awaiting your return.
Your personality was a force to be reckoned with; I watched you take on challenges that seemed too impossible to conquer. You fought off inner demons that I let scare me into a black hole for days. You spoke positivity into existence with your endless kind words and hopeful attitude; nothing could bring you down from your natural high. Seeing you go about your day with a sense of purpose inspired me every time I got to witness it.
Now you’re gone, and I have to learn how to live my life without you.
They say it’s possible that you’ll come back -- it’s a constant reassurance they drill into my head. I’m sure they want to believe it, believe in the possibility of you returning, but I don’t see their wishes becoming a reality. My darkness snuffed out your light. I can beg and plead for you to waltz back into my life, to give me a purpose or ray of light, but will it bring you home to me? Or will I forever be stranded on the island of emptiness you were so quick to leave me on?
No matter how long you’re gone, I’ll miss you. I used to do more than just miss you -- I used to fight to have you back. It became too exhausting; the battle became too brutal. I no longer hold out hope for your return, but I guess that’s what darkness does… it destroys hope.
So for now, I’ll just miss you --
I’ll continue to miss my happier self.