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WhyDoPeopleCheatinTheirMarriages?

Why Do People Cheat in Their Marriages?

It’s pretty common knowledge that nearly half of all marriages end in divorce. There are a number of reasons why couples decide to end their marriages, and infidelity is often one of those reasons. There are also couples who have dealt with one or both partners being unfaithful, but have managed to work through their problems and save their relationship.

Of course, cheating is something that most couples want to avoid at all costs. But, is this really possible? Here are some of the reasons that people are unfaithful in their marriages. These will provide insight into the ways that you can keep your marriage affair-proof.

Needs Aren’t Being Met

One of the main reasons people are unfaithful in their marriages is because their needs aren’t being met. Perhaps the wife in a relationship feels that her husband doesn’t listen to her and value her opinion. Or, a husband may feel as though his wife pays more attention to the kids than to him and doesn’t make intimacy a priority anymore. These are real marital issues, but cheating will likely not fix this issues. Open communication and/or counseling could prove helpful if one of both partners are feeling neglected.

Partners Don’t Share Sexual Fantasies with Each Other

Men often feel that they can’t share their sexual fetishes with their wives, which increases the chances that they will seek out other women to make these fantasies a reality. If a man feels that his wife won’t be willing to fulfill his fantasies in the bedroom, this can cause him to be distant from her. This problem occurs with women as well. A number of wives want their husbands to be more romantic but are afraid to speak up, and this could put the marriage in danger.

Lack of Respect for Boundaries

When you get married, it’s likely that you’ll start to naturally understand how and why boundaries should be respected. Your friends may also start respecting your boundaries by not asking you to be out past a certain hour or not calling your home past a certain time. Unfortunately, some married people don’t learn how to regard the boundaries of marriage, and this is how some affairs start. If your husband is too friendly with mutual friends or female coworkers and it makes you uncomfortable, it may be time to address the problem before it’s too late.

Offers Are Still “On The Table”

If other people still find your partner attractive and he/she is entertaining this, your marriage could be in trouble. This is especially the case if you feel that you’re not getting enough attention at home. Sure, it’s flattering to know that you’ve still “got it,” but it’s important to be respectful of your mate while keeping things friendly and platonic with your admirers.

A Damaged View of Commitment

Just because a person has a desire to be married doesn’t mean that he/she has what it takes to maintain a long-term commitment. People have varying views of marriage based on their childhoods and past romantic relationships. If your partner is prone to run to the “next best thing” every time there is a problem in your marriage, he/she will likely have an affair at some point. Counseling can help you find out how your partner sees the concept of commitment, and you may learn specific things you can do to make your spouse feel loved and wanted.

The bottom line is that when people cheat, they feel as though someone outside of their marriage can help to solve their problems. While this may provide a temporary fix, it’s quite rare that chronic infidelity can fix a marriage. If your partner gives you excuses to justify cheating, this is a sign that the behavior is not likely to stop any time soon.

Finally, it’s important to know that finding out the reason for your partner’s infidelity doesn’t guarantee that it won’t happen again. Both you and your mate have to be willing to work through your issues and establish a loving, trusting connection to decrease the chances that infidelity will take place again.

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2 comments

  • Lost_ Yank911
    Lost_ Yank911 Random thoughts from an EMT
    12mo ago

    Do you advise those contemplating marriage, to seek counseling first, especially if they come from dysfunctional or broken homes?

    Do you advise those contemplating marriage, to seek counseling first, especially if they come from dysfunctional or broken homes?

  • Lost_ Yank911
    Lost_ Yank911 Random thoughts from an EMT
    12mo ago

    I agree , and also think people cheat because of their own insecurities and when opportunity knocks, they open the door.

    I agree , and also think people cheat because of their own insecurities and when opportunity knocks, they open the door.


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Sylvia Smith is a relationship expert with years of experience in training and helping couples. She has helped countless individuals and organizations around the world, offering effective and efficient solutions for healthy and successful relationships. Her mission is to provide inspiration, [...]

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