What does love look like?
I’ve always believed that each and every one of us has something that makes us shine. For many years, my cell phone ringtone was the Earth Wind and Fire song, “Shining Star”. Whenever someone called me, I heard: You’re a shining star, no matter who you are, shining bright to see, what you can truly be. I felt like I was infusing each caller with that special message.
Over the last fifteen years, I’ve been advising all sorts of people (teens, corporate executives, stay-at-home moms) on how to have happier, healthier and more successful lives and businesses. After writing a couple of books and getting my certifications in integrative health coaching and hypnotherapy, I thought I had all the answers, but it wasn’t until my third book, a novel titled, Note to Self: Love, that I realized everything I did prior was just a prelude to finding the one most important lesson we’re all here to learn — self love. When you love yourself, you show up at your best in the world whether that's’ as a parent, a business leader or a friend.
Regardless of how self-confident you may be, many of us don’t really love ourselves and don’t think we deserve to be loved. This is especially true if you define your self worth by your outer world only—job status, appearance, money, possessions and public approval. If you believe love exists only in the material world (no offense Madonna), then expect a life of unhappiness, toxic relationships, poor health, and in extreme cases, self-destruction.
The challenge in self-love is getting to the “SELF” part—the inner self. When you truly know and connect to the inner self, you can see yourself as a shining star worthy of all the love in the world, and nothing outside of you can possibly change that. One way to start this process is to sit quietly and focus on one good trait, one good deed or one good situation in your life. If you think you don’t have any, think harder. Everyone has something special about him or her worthy of love. Once you identify your loving gift, spend a few minutes each day appreciating it.
Every day, you make hundreds of choices. Why not make one of those choices to love yourself. I invite you to join my Note to Self: Love Movement and spread love around the world, one person at a time, by recognizing what you love about yourself first. When you share what you love about yourself, you find your shining star and help others find theirs.
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Inspiring personal growth, professional success and positive change. Author of The Goddess of Happiness, Vita’s Will and Note to Self: Love (Book & Screenplay). Lover of food, fashion, fitness, funky music, dogs, dancing, cooking, laughter and anything Italian.